Not ready yet, but here goes anyway.

So much changed with Karen's passing.  What had been two happy people just tripping their way through life became one devastated old man who found himself thrashing in space. For the most part, most of the time between Karen's death and now has been spent hiding inside watching TV, reading and linking to the world via the net. I've done so little since that day.

But people have started expressing concern that I'm not engaging with life much any more. Can't say that that's wrong. To convince them (and maybe myself as well) that I am "doing" things , these are some of the ways I've chosen to spend time.

1. This  blog. (Could as well call it journal, diary, musings, digital diarrhea.)

2. Continue to slog through all the paperwork required then a spouse passes.

3. Taking math course online. Algebra I. Used to like it but it's been so long.

4. Started getting back on the bike. Very short times right now but they will get longer.

5. Thinking about going back to Weight Watchers. Have to wait until probate court and the IRS take whatever it is they will take. Once all that financial dust settles, I should be able to start real plans. The next step so to speak.

6. If I decide not to travel, I've been contemplating a pet. I think I now like cats (thanks Redit ), but still a dog person. Came across cutest West Highland Terrier as the show dog on a can of dog food.

Really! How could I not want one of these?? I would call this magnificent animal "Ewok"

It's snowing again. Today and tomorrow. Mom is here will me. As I've been telling the few people I do interact with, "It takes a lot of work to wind up at 70 receiving Social Security and living with my mother!"

I'm thinking that this blog will ultimately wind up being just a container into which I can throw all the things I want to get off my chest before I open the door Karen closed on Sept. 8, 2014. At this point, I am reviewing whether there is any point in being alive. (Heavy notes from Beethovan Fifth Symphony here, if you please.)

So that means I've been perusing Internet news all days, tv shows, Netflix, Amazon.

This is where I will vent.